If we confess our sins, the LORD is faithful to forgive us: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). As the context in First John shows, there are two key points here. First, it is essential that we confess our sins: “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us… If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us” (1 John 1:8, 10). Second, we are forgiven through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ: “If we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin… And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous: And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world” (1 John 1:7; 2:1b-2).
On the first of these points, the last article reviewed the rich Bible language for sin, confession, and forgiveness. As to the second point, it is fundamental to our faith, as indicated by the following brief list of passages:
“For this is my blood of the new covenant, which is shed for many unto remission of sins” (Matt 26:28 RVmg).
“In whom [i.e., our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father’s beloved Son] we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace” (Eph 1:7; cf. Col 1:14).
“By the which will we are sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all… But this man, after he had offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right hand of God… For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified… This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord… And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more. Now where remission of these is, there is no more offering for sin” (Heb 10:10-18).
Our heavenly Father knows that we are sinful, and that no matter how much we want to please Him, we will sin. He knows we are weak creatures of the dust and that our nature will always get the best of us. Thankfully, He loves us nonetheless and provides for these inevitability. He has given His only begotten Son, that through his sacrifice we can be forgiven. If we believe in him and confess our sins, God is faithful to cleanse us of our iniquities.
This is only the beginning of the story. Because our Father and His Son have forgiven us, we must also forgive others!
The Lord’s prayer
Jesus highlights this principle in his lesson on prayer. When we pray for our sins to be forgiven, it is conditioned on us having forgiven those that have sinned against us: “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matt 6:12); “And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us” (Luke 11:4). This concept of us, as God’s people, forgiving those indebted to us, and by analogy of us forgiving those who have sinned against us, is based on the Year of Release (Deut 15:1-11).1
Jesus emphasizes the importance of this practice by making the point again immediately after his archetypal prayer: “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt 6:14-15).
He makes this connection between us praying and us forgiving in another setting: “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses” (Mark 11:25-26).
The apostle Paul echoes this fundamental lesson several times:
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (Eph 4:32).
“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, long suffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye” (Col 3:12-13).
The parable of the unbelievably forgiving king
In yet another setting Jesus gives an extended exhortation on forgiveness, enough to fill a whole chapter in Matthew’s gospel (Matt 18). He ends the talk with a parable (Matt 18:23-35), usually called “The Unforgiving Debtor” or “The Ungrateful Servant”. We have chosen instead to put the emphasis on the king, who is willing to forgive a mind-boggling amount, assuming we are willing to reciprocate to those who have trespassed against us.
One of the king’s servants is brought to him. This servant owes the king 10,000 talents, the wages from an eternity of lifetimes (a talent was 6,000 denarii, and a denarius was the daily wage of a laborer). In response to the king’s negative verdict, the servant pleads for patience, making the impossible claim that he will pay off the debt in full. Moved with compassion, the king forgives the servant the entire debt.
What a wonderful story. If it had stopped here, we would have thought all ended well. Surely this servant would be on his very best behavior given the unexpected leniency of his lord. Surely he would treat others with the same spirit of kindness he had been shown.
Instead, this servant goes out and finds one of his fellow servants, who owes him 100 denarii (about four months’ wages). Instead of showing mercy, he takes him by the throat and insists that he pays off the debt. Unable to pay, the fellow servant pleads for patience, making a perfectly reasonable claim that he will pay off the debt in full. Unlike the king, the servant refuses the plea bargain and has his fellow servant thrown into prison.
All the other servants are sorry to see this pitiful behavior, and go tell their lord what had happened. The king calls the servant to him, and says, “O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee?” (Matt 18:32-33). The king is furious, and delivers the servant to the tormentors.
Jesus summarizes the lesson of the parable with the same words we’ve seen above, “So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not everyone his brother their trespasses” (Matt 18:35).
The parable suggests there are three good reasons we should forgive others:
- Joy — God has forgiven each of us a massive amount, so we should be thankful, and more than willing to forgive others the miniscule amount they owe us.
- Duty — God’s forgiveness of us is contingent on us forgiving others.
- Guilt — If we don’t forgive others, then God will have us thrown into the torture chamber to serve out our full term of pain and suffering.
The order here may be helpful too. It is best to forgive out of joy, but if we can’t do that, then forgiving out of duty is next best, and if we still have trouble doing that, then at least we should forgive out of guilt if only to avoid being punished. We have a choice of motivation: being motivated by joy is most pleasant, whereas being motivated by guilt is least satisfying. We see the same point if we follow the money: being motivated by joy is associated with the largest, essentially un imaginable amount of money; by duty with a small, almost trivial amount; and by guilt with no money at all, just an impossible debt. These options correspond to ways to live the Truth: we can live a life of joy in response to God’s generosity; or we can live a life of duty being driven by a list of onerous have-to’s, or we can live out an unpleasant guilt-ridden existence. To paraphrase Joshua: As for me and my house, we will live by joy!
We must acknowledge the enormity of our own sins against our heavenly Father. If He was not gracious to us, none of us would have any hope at all. If He had not sent His Son we would be lost. If His Son had not willingly laid down his life for us, we would still be in our sins. The relief that comes from experiencing such love should provoke us to love one another, and prod us into forgiving anything bad that someone might do to us. This is what God expects. We are to reflect His forgiving character in our lives, just as His Son has reflected his Father’s character. This is the joy of true heavenly fellowship.
The process of reconciliation
Earlier in this article, Jesus outlines a three-step process that we should follow in order to be reconciled with those who trespass against us:
“Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, [Step 1:] go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. [Step 2:] But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. [Step 3:] And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever [sins] ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever [sins] ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them” (Matt 18:15-20).
Here we focus on the first phase of the process.2There are seven key ingredients to Jesus’ command:
- If there is a conflict
- You
- Go
- To the person
- In private
- And discuss the problem
- For the purpose of reconciliation
You must take action, rather than letting the hurt fester. You should not wait for the other person to come to you: you must go to them. You must not add fuel to the fire: do not assume the worse; impute good motives instead. Do not tell anyone else: you must go directly to the person, one-on-one, in private. It may have been a simple misunderstanding, an honest mistake, an unintended offense; and even if it wasn’t, you must give the person an opportunity to repent before taking it to anyone else. Your intent must be to reconcile. Give the person a way to save face, if necessary, to confess, to apologize, to repent, to make things right by you. In short, you must do everything you can to let them do everything they can to reconcile with you. (And do not think sending an e-mail substitutes for going to the person.)
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus teaches a similar lesson with the shoe on the other foot: “Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift” (Matt 5:23-24).
This is how we would want to be treated if we had trespassed against someone, so we should do the same to those who trespass against us.
How many times should we forgive?
In response to Jesus’ teaching on the process of reconciling with those who have trespassed against us, Peter asks, “Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?” to which Jesus responds, “I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven” (Matt 18:21-22). In a similar exchange Jesus tells the disciples, “Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him” (Luke 17:3-4).
We are like Peter. We can agree that we might sometimes need to forgive others, but surely there is a limit to how much we should have to put up with. Seven times ought to be sufficient. But Jesus expects more: in one case, he says even if it gets up to 70 times 7; in the other, he says even if the trespasses occur 7 times in a single day.
The first of these contrasts with Lamech’s boast of retribution: “Because vengeance has been exacted seven times on Cain’s behalf, on Lamech’s it shall be seventy times seven” (Gen 4:24 LXX, same Greek phrase). Jesus may also be alluding to Daniel’s 70 weeks prophecy:
“Seventy weeks [i.e., seventy sevens] are determined upon thy people and upon thy holy city, to finish the transgression, and to make an end of sins, and to make reconciliation for iniquity, and to bring in everlasting righteousness, and to seal up the vision and prophecy, and to anoint the most Holy” (Dan 9:24).
In short, there is no limit to how forgiving we must be. No wonder the apostles responded to our Lord’s command, “Increase our faith” (Luke 17:5).
The Origin of the Organic World – Part One