Patience – Part 13

I am sure every parent, in fact every adult, who has had the occasion to take young children on a long car ride, whether to a CYC event, Bible school or on vacation, has experienced the impatient whine of the “Are we there yet?” syndrome. Per­haps this doesn’t relate well to parents today, but believe it or not: before iPods, DVD players in cars, and various portable electric games it was extremely hard to entertain children on even the shortest of trips. One excursion that particularly stands out in my memory is taking a group of CYC youngsters to a Yankee baseball game when we lived in Setauket, Long Island. From our house to the stadium was a car ride of about two hours. The parents brought all the children to our house, and we took off in a rented van with eight children ranging in ages from eight to 15 years old. We hadn’t gotten more than 10 minutes into our ride when the litany began: “Are we there yet, Uncle John?” And this phrase was repeated every few minutes by various children all the way to the Bronx. Fortunately, on the way home the children were so tired they more or less snoozed, and I was thankful for that blessing. The “Are we there yet?” syndrome is so familiar that it has become a symbol of childhood impatience that has been satirized in TV sitcoms, movies and various publications (a quick check of amazon.com yielded more than 10 media titles connected with this phrase).

Why is this phrase so ubiquitous? Probably because it is almost assuredly a uni­versal lament of childhood, directly related to the inability of immature minds to postpone fulfillment. A corollary to the “Are we there yet?” expression is the “I want it now” demand, another phrase that is frequently blurted out by young children. Indeed, impatience is the characteristic feature of an immature person regardless of chronological age. It is the exact antithesis of the character of our heavenly Father, who is “longsuffering” in His graciousness (Exod 34:6; Num 14:18, and Psa 86:15 among others).

The apostle James exhorts us to be patient when he says:

“You also be patient. Establish your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is at hand” (James 5:8).

Almost 2,000 years have passed since he wrote those words, and some might say: What could he have possibly meant by seeming to indicate that the Lord was going to come shortly, i.e., that his coming was “at hand”? Without a doubt it would have completely discouraged the brethren and sisters in the first century if James had said: Be patient, for the Lord’s coming is 2,000 years from now! While it might be our earnest desire that our Lord Jesus Christ come soon, as I have heard expressed in many prayers including some of my own, it cannot be a proper prayer unless accompanied by the phrase “if it be Thy will”. God is not slack concerning the fulfillment of His promises. As the apostle Peter tells us, He is “longsuffering… not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance” (2Pe 3:9). Impatient persons might lose their faith if they don’t realize that, as long as the work of calling out a people for His name is unfinished, the LORD God will patiently continue this dispensation.

As far as we are concerned, patiently waiting for the coming of our Messiah, in the sense recorded by James, does not constitute 2,000 years; at most it can only have reference to our own lifespan. Consequently, the apostle is exhorting us to a lifetime of patient waiting for the Lord’s return. Surely he will come; there can be no doubt that it will happen (Heb 6:13). We may go to bed tomorrow and wake up the next morning to find that our Lord Jesus Christ has come. On the other hand, one might be in the grave thousands of years like the patriarch Abraham, yet just as assuredly, with his next waking moment, he will see his redeemer (cf Job 19:25,26). There is no delay in either case, because there is no consciousness of time passing for those asleep in Christ.

There are many other aspects of leading a life of mature patience that we need to explore. In a sense, many people never grow up; when they want something they want it now regardless of the consequences! Such people invariably demonstrate certain characteristics:

• They are quick to speak, and slow to listen.
• They are prone to excessive speed when driving — in a hurry to get there.
• They are impatient at red lights, often running through stop signs.
• They may become extremely annoyed when caught behind a slow driver.
• They may be abusive toward their spouses or children if they don’t immediately get their own way.
• They have difficulty controlling their debts, sometimes running up unsustain­able credit card balances.
• They demand quick job promotions without associated merit.
• They have difficulty in holding down a job; there is always some excuse for resigning or being fired, but never accepting one’s own responsibility.
• They are often jealous of what others have obtained, yet unwilling to put in the time and sacrifice to better their own circumstances.
• They fail to consider what effect their actions have upon others.

I have outlined just a few of the human behavior patterns of impatient people I have observed in my lifetime (including proneness in myself at times). The list is not meant to be all-inclusive, nor is it in any particular order of importance. If you see any of yourself in this list please do not be offended, but contemplate whether or not this is what you want to be. Ask yourself: is a change of behavior required? We might fool others, we might even fool ourselves, but our childish, immature behavior cannot be hidden from God:

“For there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; neither hid, that shall not be known” (Luke 12:2, NKJV). 

God does not want immaturity from us. As we read and feed upon the word of God throughout our lives, there must be growth in our spiritual character. Without this concomitant development of our spiritual life, in doing the daily readings, for example, attending Bible classes and the memorial service will not avail us when we face our Master at the judgment seat. I believe we will not be asked how much we have studied (as valuable as that might be), but rather what we have done with the precious word we have been given.

“..As newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby..” (1Pe 2:2 NKJV).

A baby is fed milk because it does not yet have teeth to dig into meat. Chewing and digesting are something that takes time and work, whether it is physical food or mental delicacies. A child cries when hunger pangs occur, and it needs immediate attention. An adult can wait with patience while a good meal is being prepared. (With apologies and my regrets to all who prefer fast food as opposed to slow food!)

Ultimately immature behavior leads to sin and can destroy any possibility of leading a Christian life. Consider the situation in the ecclesia in Corinth:

“I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it, and even now you are still not able..” (1Co 3:2, NKJV).

The Corinthians were still acting like babies; their behavior exhibited extreme immaturity in Christ. Their lack of spiritual depth had caused dissension in the church and even the acceptance of moral depravity because family connections prevented them from doing the right thing. Factions had developed that were likely to lead to division:

“What I mean is this: One of you says, ‘I follow Paul’; another, ‘I follow Apollos’; another, ‘I follow Cephas’; still another, ‘I follow Christ’ ” (1Co 1:12, NIV).

“For when one says, ‘I am of Paul,’ and another, ‘I am of Apollos,’ are you not carnal?” (1Co 3:4, NKJV).

The apostle made it abundantly clear that divisiveness and factionalism were altogether wrong behavior in the Corinthian ecclesia and it had to cease. Notice Paul’s analysis of such immature behavior: “Are you not carnal?” We are of the flesh, not the spirit, if we are immature people, and if we are carnal we cannot inherit the kingdom of God:

“Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed can be. So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God” (Rom 8:7,8, NKJV).

We are expected to grow up so that we can serve others. The Scriptures are emphatic in telling us that. As long as we remain immature Christians, we are not doing the will of our heavenly Father.

“For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God; and you have come to need milk and not solid food. For everyone who partakes only of milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, for he is a babe” (Heb 5:12,13, NKJV).

How then can we grow to become mature followers or our Lord Jesus Christ? There are some key guidelines we can adopt to nurture our spiritual growth. Growing in maturity means that our studies of the word of God must be applied to:

• Developing our character: if we don’t grow in our love for our brethren and sisters and our families, and in our service to God, then we are still babes.
• Setting out long-term goals for improvement.
• Planning the necessary means for achieving these goals.
• Sticking to these goals, especially when faced with stormy emotional seas.

There are many examples I could choose to illustrate how this may apply in life, but obviously space is limited; hence a few will have to suffice. I recall once that a young brother was rather restricted in his job opportunities and wanted to get a master’s degree to solve this problem. However, he was very discouraged about doing so because he had a wife and children and couldn’t afford to quit his job and go to school full-time. He told me it would take five years going to night school, and that he would be in his mid-thirties before he would graduate. I asked him how old he would be in five years if he didn’t go on for more schooling? He got the point and achieved his goal with distinction.

The same can be said of developing our opportunities in the ecclesia. If we want to preach in foreign lands we may need to learn their languages. This won’t hap­pen by magic, but only by planning and determined effort. If an ecclesia needs to improve its speaking brethren’s exhortations, it won’t happen by complaining about it. The ecclesia will need to spend the time and effort to have mutual improvement classes taught by qualified teachers. If we are to be of service to brethren and sisters in need (surely as worthwhile a goal as being a better speaker), we have to find out what those needs may be. Merely wondering why others do not come out for meetings and Bible classes will not solve the problem. Only appropriate action and organized effort to provide time and resources to satisfy those needs will alleviate the situation.

Our ultimate goal is to be citizens in the Kingdom of God. To achieve this objec­tive we need a long-term plan and we need to stick to it. That requires patience. This is an extremely important aspect of our character development, because the Scriptures tell us it is absolutely essential if we are to obtain eternal life (Rom 2:6,7; also Rev. 3:10¹). We need to stick to the job at hand; there can be no vacation from doing the work of the Lord.

“But the ones that fell on the good ground are those who, having heard the word with a noble and good heart, keep it and bear fruit with patience” (Luke 8:15).

Undeniably, bearing fruit with patience can be extremely difficult at times, because life is not always smooth sailing. We may find that:

• Our brethren and sisters may disappoint us in their actions.
• They may offend us personally.
• Sickness may strike us or those we love dearly.
• Financial ill-fortune may fall upon us.
• Personal tragedy might strike us and sorely try our faith.
• Preaching work may yield very little return.
• Our own families may be aliens to the truth and make our service to God difficult.

It is when disappointments and sorrows pile on us that we most need to work at patient continuance in serving our heavenly Father; for He is patient and longsuffering with us:

“And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience” (Rom 5:3, KJV).

He will reward our patience with His grace:

“Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom” (Luke 12:32, NKJV).²

The apostle James superbly describes the attitude of mind that a mature Christian needs to develop:

“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing” (James 1:2-4, NKJV.)³

The NIV renders the word “perfect” as “mature”, and this is certainly a more reasonable translation since it is impossible for us to be “perfect” now, in the absolute sense!

In this lifetime, all of us will surely endure, in some measure, offenses, temptations, sufferings, trials, persecutions and tribulations. By patiently enduring such we emulate in a small way our Lord and Master Jesus Christ. It is only at such times that we can ever hope to come even marginally close to appreciating the horrible torture and death that our Lord and Messiah patiently endured for us. Jesus was the ultimate example of patient maturity, never losing sight of the ultimate goal. In doing so, he gave us an example that we need to keep before us every moment of our lives, so that we might be complete.

“…Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Heb 12:2, NKJV).

1. Here the Greek word hupomone is used for the “patience”, i.e., logos hupomone = word of my patience. See Strong’s number 5281.
2. See also NKJV, Romans 5:3,4: “And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
3. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:2-4, NIV).