The previous article (Sept./Oct. 1981) introduced the subject of telephone messages and examined the process of selecting topics to use while current events subjects have yielded excellent response, there is potential for numerous non-topical themes. These can “fill-in” when there is no current news item to feature while adding variety and appeal to the calendar of phone topics. Finally, for each topic selected, the ecclesia must have identified a suitable pamphlet to offer.
Assigning selected topics to calendar months, perhaps in harmony with other scheduled ecclesial preaching efforts (such as lectures, canvassing, ads etc.), provides a means of structure and aids identifying key deadlines that must be met (ordering pamphlets, writing scripts, placing classified ads, planning follow-up work).
Critique Ready-Made Scripts for Improvements
For smaller ecclesias, using scripts developed by others is the most common source for telephone messages. There are several advantages. The task of writing a message from scratch is avoided; a pamphlet has already been found; the classified ad copy (wording) worked out; and the topic’s appeal in generating calls may have proven itself.
Most ecclesias have benefited from the “ready-made” phone talks available from Bro. Chris Barrett’s telephone preaching “clearinghouse.” Chris will put the requesting ecclesia on his list and when a new phone script is developed a copy will be sent to the ecclesia. Direct request of Bro. Chris at 18646 Malden St., Northridge, CA 91324.
When a script arrives, it’s wise to review it for possible improvements. Especially with current-events topics, the writer was probably working under time pressures and did not have the luxury of drafting a final version. Therefore, before using the script, the ecclesia should take the opportunity to enhance and embellish an already worthwhile message. Most often improvements will be in the “listenable” areas such as breaking a complex sentence into two simple sentences; or rearranging phrases in a sentence to yield greater clarity to the ear.
So far, the “ready-made scripts” have been of the current-events variety. As suggested earlier, there are times when the headlines do not lend themselves to tie-ins with prophecy. Yet, the potential for an appealing and worthwhile theme exists. Probably more attention will be devoted to non-topical messages as phone preaching continues.
Developing Much-Needed Original Material
Certainly much will be gained if every ecclesia attempts to originate its own messages on various themes. This is especially true with a network for sharing successes and failures.
Writing (or more accurately, researching and writing) a telephone message is not quite like other communication forms. While it does require some special attention, it is by no means an overwhelming task.
Let’s start with a definition that provides a sense of our task. A telephone message is two minutes of non-stop talking on an appealing subject; it provides selective thought-provoking information and ideas in an appealing personal way so to lead the listener to ask for more.
Structurally, our message will have an introduction, a middle, and a closing. In conceptualizing and writing each portion, several points seem relevant.
Introduction. After the “thank you for calling,” immediately touch on one known human need in connection with the topic. Our caller wants to know why he should keep listening. Example: “With Sadat dead, will Russia encroach further into the Middle East?” This would seem appropriate because most people are troubled by Soviet aggression; so this approach (and it’s only one) touches my need for security and freedom from anxiety. It’s appropriate also because Bible prophecy refers to Russia. We cannot specifically answer the question as posed, but we can tie in relevant prophetic data.
Occasionally a topic has built-in relevance. If recently awakened by books cascading from shelves to floor, I’ll probably relate quickly to an “Earthquake” topic. For the most part though, the ink to basic human needs is needed. I’ll only request the pamphlet if I feel “I’m affected by all this.”
Some basic needs that might relate to phone topics are:
- Physical: security, long-life, comfort/avoidance of suffering.
- Emotional: affliction/belonging, freedom from anxiety and fear, recognition, self-esteem.
- Mental/spiritual: to know/learn/ be right/be in control; to have standards/priorities; to sense (or create) order and purpose; to be prepared; to find peace in life; to believe in a higher power.
Middle (or body). What single idea do we want our caller to take away? It’s useful to write it down. Example: “With Israel in their homeland as prophesied, Jesus could return at any time, but I may not be ready.” Limited message time requires we exhibit only a sample of our evidence/facts/reasons, etc. Therefore, such evidence must be concise, very credible, and very clear. If a scripture passage is used, only the kernel should be quoted.
The middle section should try to proceed from, or return to, the basic need already introduced. Example: “In this same chapter Jesus also predicts many people will be unprepared. Such will be caught in some serious upheavals before Jesus finally brings lasting peace and prosperity.”
The closing. There’s been (hopefully) a sense of urgency about our message and our caller wants to discover more. So isn’t it all downhill for our finish? Not really. For a lot of people, talking to a machine, leaving name & address, is sort of spooky. So the entire script must allow the closing remarks offering the pamphlet to be unhurried and encouraging. If our speaker has to race to make the 1 minute deadline, our conclusion may sound like a used-car commercial.
Some other points. It’s best to state our offer twice, so “free” comes through strongly. Left to themselves, callers often mumble names and addresses. That can make us look bad when our envelope arrives bearing inaccurate spellings etc. So we must ask our caller to please spell his name/address. A final thank you precedes the “tone.”
Having examined some guidelines for the various sections of the message, there are some further suggestions which apply throughout the text.
First and foremost: write for the ear, conversationally. Shorter sentences and everyday words are easier to listen to and understand.
Try to simplify. Any data that is complex, or likely to be unfamiliar, is best presented in several single-concept sentences. “The apostle Paul, writing to the Romans in Chapter 11, drove home the lesson that although Israel was temporarily out of favor, God would yet accomplish His purpose with the Jews.” There are several ways to improve the listenability; one being: “In Romans Chapter 11, Paul repeatedly insists that God still has plans for Israel.”
Avoid words which might confuse the ear. Read aloud the final draft to a brother or sister unfamiliar with the script to test for problem words and phrases. Make sure “can’t” will not be heard as “can.”
Colorful and active words help. “Ezekiel describes a confrontation . . .” could be “Ezekiel portrays a clash . . .” Would you rather “hear about” or “learn about,” or “discover?”
When concluding one part of our case, a brief summary sentence helps carry us to the next information.
The suggestions given, both for text and style, are not exhaustive nor will every one apply all the time to every script.
Who Can Write a Phone Talk?
Just about any servant willing to apply himself/herself to the task can turn out a worthwhile script. Because we are all different personalities with special ways of seeing and talking about things, what tremendous potential we have as a community to develop scripts that catch, hold and motivate outsiders on many, many subjects.
Although the “committee approach” would not normally be appropriate to this sort of task, a phone script could be an excellent CYC or sister’s class project.
Lord willing, the next article will discuss suggestions for making the actual recording and writing the classified ad.
The Origin of the Organic World – Part One