Cause To Offend

“A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city” (Prov 18:19).

“But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matt 18:6).

Introduction

Many things in life offend me: the apparent need for drivers to cut me off by merging into my braking space in traffic, the prevalence of unsuitable language, sales clerks asking for my address, loud music from my neighbors late at night, statements in addresses that I know are incorrect. Perhaps some are offended by my own actions or words: it is inevitable, I expect, that anyone who tries to present an assessment of almost any topic in our community will offend someone.

So what is one to do? To be so careful as to offend no-one is almost impossible, and if it were so you would finish up saying nothing of any significance or value. But the apparent advise of the Scriptures is to do exactly that: to attempt to avoid offending any brother, and certainly not any of the “little ones”, those who are young in the Truth. But can this be true? Some certainly think so: how many times have you heard something like this:

“I disagree with your actions (or opinions): furthermore, if you persist, you will offend me. As this is a cause of offense to me, you ought to desist.”

Perhaps looking at the above passages in a different, more modern translation will help.

“A brother helped is like a strong city, but quarreling is like the bars of a castle” (Prov 18:19 RSV)

“If anyone causes one of these little ones — those who believe in me — to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea” (Matt 18:6 NIV).

Admittedly, I have chosen a somewhat extreme example in using the RSV of the Proverbs passage, but it is clear the Hebrew is obscure and capable of different readings: so to put any weight on this passage is unwise. And all modern translations invert the sense of the Matthew passage in the KJV: it is more correctly translated as not to offend a person, but to cause them to stumble in their Christian walk.

The message of Scriptures

To study the various passages makes it clear:

  1. The word “offend” is never used to describe an attitude of mere displeasure, or to denote dissatisfaction with a decision.
  2. The word “offence” in the New Testament almost always means a causing to fall, an occasion of stumbling. Certainly this is the case with all those passages which exhort the servant of God not to give offence by his conduct; You can see this in these passages (all from the NIV)

“But so that we may not cause offense, go to the lake and throw out your line. Take the first fish you catch; open its mouth and you will find a four-drachma coin. Take it and give it to them for my tax and yours” (Matt 17:27).

“It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall” (Rom 14:21).

“Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother or sister to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause them to fall” (1 Cor 8:13).

Meats offered to idols

However, it is also clear that we must go to great lengths to avoid causing any servant of Christ to stumble. The New Testament examples are mostly concerned with “meats offered to idols”, which is not any sort of problem in our age. But the society in the 1st century was saturated with idol worship, and it was common for meat sold in the marketplace to have been consecrated as a sacrifice to false gods prior to its sale. The Jews would have nothing to do with such meat, wary of “unclean” food-handling practices and believing that to partake of consecrated meat was to give tacit approval of idol worship. Thus the Jewish Christians’ consciences were being severely affected, and the outcome of the Jerusalem conference provided a situation where Gentile converts could show their Jewish colleagues that, while they had not adopted the practices of Judaism, they had certainly separated themselves from paganism. This was the stumbling block to many Jewish converts, who sincerely believed that the Gentile believers’ failure to follow the precepts of the Law of Moses was an implicit rejection of the Faith and holding onto an ungodly way of life.

Paul was prepared to become a vegetarian to avoid causing his fellow Jewish Christians’ conscience to be so troubled. And so must we: our fellow believers’ faith must never be destroyed by our actions or statements. Fortunately, this “meat offered to idols” is not a problem: but there are somewhat similar problems today. I list a few below: I offer no comment on these problems, only to reflect on the way they are sometimes viewed in a way similar to “meats offered to idols”, as causing some to have their Christian consciences troubled.

  • The celebration of Christmas: some are troubled by its pagan origin, some are not
  • The Bible and Science: some are troubled by the insistence of a particular way of reconciling the Genesis account with modern science as being the only way
  • Consumption of alcohol: some are troubled by the very idea of Christadel­phians drinking any alcohol, some are not at all
  • Non-Christadelphian friends: some give advice against any association whatsoever with non-Christadelphians, except as necessary to obtain em­ployment etc. Some are quite happy to have both Christadelphian and non­Christadelphian friends.

The actual effect of these potential ways of “causing to offend” can only be decided by the person who claims he has been caused to potentially offend his conscience. He has to say if his faith has been so seriously undermined that it may be destroyed, or if what has occurred has simply upset him. But it is worth remembering that there are many more things that can be categorized as upsetting, than can be classified as giving offence in the Scriptural sense. And, if the incident has merely upset him, it is wrong to speak about being offended, and about the seriousness of giving offence. He cannot use a passage like Matt 18:7 unless the incident has really placed his personal salvation in jeopardy. The giving of offense cannot be used to express displeasure with another’s actions or views, or to indicate dissatisfaction with a decision, whether it be individual or ecclesial.

I find that offensive

All too often the offense that is caused is used as an occasion to impose one’s will on an individual or ecclesia. Even though the offense is not going to cause the individual to stumble in their faith, their dislike can often cause the threat that they will no longer attend. There might be occasions when the offense rises to the level as genuinely troubling someone’s conscience (we have seen such sometimes over the matter of fellowship), but such occasions are infrequent. More often such claims are used to impose one’s will, perhaps against the majority views of the ecclesia. Unfortunately, although majority rule is not the ideal way, it is, in the current dispensation, better than any other alternative (although sometimes I think that casting lots would be better — as has intermittently been argued in our community.)

Employing a so-called offence is sometimes used as a thinly disguised attempt to impose one person’s preferences upon the whole ecclesia. This is contrary to the overriding principle of ecclesial life, where each member has to learn to submit to the will of others, and not impose his or her own feelings unilaterally. Offence between brethren ought to be a contradiction in terms, for brothers and sisters have a relationship that was created by Christ’s work of reconciliation, and reconciliation breaks down barriers:

“For he is our peace, who hath made both one, and hath broken down the middle wall of partition between us … that he might reconcile both unto God in one body by the cross, having slain the enmity thereby … For through him we both have access by one Spirit unto the Father” (Eph 2:14–18).

It is a hard thing to do, to neither give nor take offense. A thoughtless word, an idle comment, a decision on a seemingly trivial point, can all cause offense. Let us all try to avoid making that offense a cause for stumbling. Let us try to avoid taking offense, and let us try to remember our savior, who reconciled ourselves to himself at such great cost. So let us be reconciled to each other, in the spirit of Christ.