The Lord’s Servant Must Not Quarrel

“Constant kindness can accomplish much,” said Albert Schweitzer. “As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust and hostility to evaporate.”

At a time when we are facing opposition within our family, in our ecclesia, or in our brotherhood, it is wise to remember to be kind. When we believe that our position on a matter is being challenged, we may rise to the defense by speaking in a manner more forthright than kind. Sometimes we may say things we wish we could take back. It is even possible to be correct in the position we have taken and yet sin in the way we treat those who oppose us.

Don’t we have an obligation to speak the truth, to show people where they are wrong? It is quite right to stand up for what we believe, but we should do so with kindness. Paul gives us good advice as to how to handle those who oppose us. “Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance, leading them to a knowledge of the truth.” We need to try to work with those who disagree with us by teaching them gently, as Paul says. We need to help them to a clearer understanding because we care for them and want them to be saved.

We all need the wisdom of Solomon, and sadly, we do not have it as we ought. He tells us, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good. The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.”

We can be ever so sincere in standing up for what we believe, but if we crush others rather than working to heal them, we are not doing right. We all know how sincere Saul of Tarsus was as he “was breathing out threatening’s and slaughter against the disciples of the Lord.” Although the Lord may not strike us down and speak to us from heaven, as he did to Saul, we need to let the inspired word touch our hearts and cause us to stop and consider our ways. No one was more sincere than Saul, but no one was ever more wrong. He was not ignorant of the Old Testament writings — he had been taught at the feet of Gamaliel — and yet he did not understand the purpose of God in Christ. He thought that eliminating Christians would be pleasing to God.

Isaiah warned Israel, “Hear the word of the Lord, ye that tremble at his word: Your brethren that hate you, that cast you out for my name’s sake, have said, Let the Lord be glorified, that we may see your joy; but it is they that shall be put to shame.” Those in Isaiah’s day who thought that they were glorifying God by casting out some of their brethren, those who thought that their actions were in God’s name, were wrong. They were going to be put to shame. We need to realize that there is a danger that we can think we are acting on God’s behalf when we are not.

Solomon tells us, “Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the hearts.” Most folks think they are right. Since it is possible to be completely sincere and still be sincerely wrong, we need to be kind and gentle with those whom we consider wrong. Brian Tracy has said, “You will regret many things in life, but you will never regret being too kind or too fair.” Gently instructing those who oppose us, working together to gain a better understanding of the issues that divide us, and giving differing opinions a fair hearing, is a kind and fair process. More than that, it is a process that helps all parties, including ourselves, gain a better understanding. After a careful analysis, we may find to our surprise, as Paul did, that some of our viewpoints are not entirely correct.

Jesus teaches us, “Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.” We all want peace in our family. We want peace in our ecclesias and in the brotherhood. The LORD ponders our hearts. He knows all that is going on in our lives. There is no doubt at all that He tests us by arranging circumstances to see if we are kind and gentle and easy to be entreated in our dealings with others, even when under stress. Whatever we do must be done in such a way as not to sow discord, for again it is Solomon who tells us, “These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him…” The seventh item Solomon lists is “he that soweth discord among brethren.”

Sowing discord is not spelled out in our statement of faith, but it is plainly something the Lord hates. We had better be careful that we are peacemakers and not stirring up strife in our dealings with others. Let us always remember Paul’s admonition: “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”