Hazards of the Wife Working Outside the Home

Dear Susan,

My last letter commented on the hazards of the wife working outside the home. This may have raised in your mind the question, “Can a virtuous wife work?

Yes! Of course she can.

The virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 is an enterprising, highly productive woman of diverse skills and capabilities. She sought out good quality flax (v.13) spun it into linen (v.19), made linen garments for her family (vs. 21-22) and, considering that “her merchandise is profitable” (v.18), she made garments for sale to the merchants (v.24) and used the ‘fruit of her hands” to extend the family’ s property holdings (v.16).

This passage has great spiritual implications but it is based on away of life that was true for millennia. Wives were goods-producing members of the household.

In many parts of the world today, this same pattern prevails. The wife sells garden produce, dairy products, homemade sewing or baked goods in addition to providing these items for her family. According to Uncle Tom, in economic jargon, that is called a “cottage industry.”

In or outside the home

The issue I raised last time was not whether or not it is appropriate for a wife to work. The issue is whether or not it is appropriate for a wife to work outside her home. Since you have grownup in today’s world, you may not realize that the ready ability of a woman to work outside her home is a fairly recent development.

Today’s multitude of servants

If somebody asked you if you had any servants to do your work for you, you would be amused at the question. But, in a manner of speaking, you have a lot of them.

All of the electrical appliances that you were given at your wedding did not exist 125 years ago. Remember that for 5,875 years the world got along without the ability to use electricity. In addition, the washer, dryer, dishwasher and microwave that you take for granted were not available as little as 60 years ago. You may not have any domestic servants, but you have a number of mechanical ones.

Furthermore, you have convenience foods and ready-made clothing that were not available until recently. Many of these things we just take for granted; but not too long ago, people of our economic level were making most of their own clothes, grinding meal into flour , preserving their own fruits and vegetables, etc. These tasks dominated the woman’s time and left her little choice but to work steadily, at home. In our society, those who sew their own clothes or grind their own flour do so from choice, not necessity.

Jobs available

To work outside of the home, a woman must have time and an available job. When you finished school, you got a job with little difficulty. And where you work, they give women equal pay for equal work and give promotions based on merit.

These conditions are relatively new. Before this century, most laboratory and clerical jobs were held by men. Before World War II, about the only manufacturing jobs open to women were in the textile and garment industries.

With the decrease in heavy manufacturing and the increase in service and office jobs, as well as laws requiring equal treatment, the job opportunities for women to work outside the home, are greater than ever before. All of these things, however, are relatively recent developments. There’s nothing new about women working or being income-producing members of the household. What’s new is that so many women have the time and opportunity to work away from home.

Disadvantages to working outside the home

In my last letter, I covered a couple of these and alluded to some others which I now want to draw to your attention.

If we accept that part of God’s design is for women to lead a home-centered life, then, inherently, working outside the home will subject you to situations and feelings that are difficult for you to handle. Consider , for example, the relationship between yourself and other men at work. Not all of them have high moral standards. You’re attractive and some of them will pay you a lot of attention whether or not you are married. Sure, you have handled it, but it’ s a pressure that would be nice not to have. There are also the feelings that can develop when your boss is a man. If he is half-way decent, you inevitably develop a certain loyalty toward him with a desire to protect and defend him. These are feelings that! know you would rather reserve for John and your family. If he isn’t decent, you might become so frustrated with him that you paint all men, even John, with the same brush.

Every so often, there will be a tangible conflict between John and him for your time. John will want you to take a Friday off, or get certain weeks for vacation, when your boss wants you at work. This whole uncomfortable situation is another disadvantage of many jobs.

Consider, too, how working outside the home interferes with the kind of home atmosphere you want to establish. You have to leave early in the morning, with both of you scrambling for your coffee and breakfast. When you get home, you are tired and not interested in preparing much of a dinner. That means either going back out for a meal or doing with some convenience food. Saturdays will be a pick-up and cleaning day rather than a time for family or ecclesial activities. So much of the quality time in a marriage is spent doing small, everyday tasks in a quiet manner with each other. If the whole atmosphere is one of rush, you will tend to discourage the personal and spiritual growth of both of you.

Don’ t forget John’s need for Bible study. He shows a lot of potential for helping the ecclesia. I’ve found that a brother who is active in the meeting has what amounts to a second job. Your own career may significantly detract from that development.

Working at home

What l’ d suggest you do is figure out a way you can earn income while basically staying home. You have skills in education, music, typing, sewing and cooking. Why not concentrate on what interests you the most and develop that skill to a marketable level. With the continued development in home computers, there are all kinds of possibilities opening up. You may have to take a week-long session on some computer program, but that’s a lot better than going out to work every day.

Use a little imagination and I suspect you’ll find you can stay home and have a greater net effect on the family income than by what you’ re doing now. If you make staying at home a matter of faith and prayer, I’m sure God will help your efforts.

When children come, the reasons for staying home are really multiplied. But that’s a consideration for another time.

With much love,
Aunt Sarah

Dear Susan,

Well, here comes some more advice from the school of experience I do appreciate your listening to my thoughts about practical matters without getting your feelings hurt.

When I wrote you about a family budget, I suggested that you can often do something about the income as well as the expense side of family finances. The budget helps you control and reduce expenses. The other option is to work at increasing your family income. We have learned that there are some subtleties to this matter which I’ d like to share with you

Right now you have a job and you’ve not given much thought to quitting and staying home full-time. In our society, that’s normal at the start of a marriage. There will come a point, however, and it could be sooner rather than later, when you will want to give some hard, prayerful thought to giving up your job. You’ll start a family or you’ll realize you could make it on John’s salary if you tightened up on some expenses, or the job will start detracting from your marriage.

Whatever the case might be, there are some things we have found a wife needs to consider about her working outside the house to increase family income.

Compute the net effect of working

Always look at the bottom-line. That sounds like Uncle Tom talking, but it is a good point to keep in mind in family life as well as in business. What is the real money impact of your working?

You may say, “I’m making $8 an hour, 40 hours a week, 52 weeks of the year. That’s $16,640 a year added to our family income.” But that’ snot true! About 40% of that amount goes in taxes. You may say that’ sway too high a figure, but stop and add it up. There’s a 5% state income tax, 8% social security tax and 28% federal income tax. That is 41%, and you may even have a city income tax to pay.

I know you are not paying an overall 28% federal tax but the income you make, on top of John’s, is taxed at the 28% rate. Just figure it out. You need to figure your income as the top part of your family income. That’s being taxed at the top rate and you get no extra deductions from the additional income. So right from the start a figure like $16,000 is only adding about $10,000 to the family funds.

Then look at the additional expenses caused by the wife working.

You drive 20 miles round-trip to work. That’s 5,000 miles a year at $.25 a mile or $1 ,250 per year. You may say there’s no way your car costs that much to operate. But figure it out including insurance, repairs, maintenance and total car payments as well as gas and oil. You’ll be amazed at how expensive a car really is to operate.

Food and household supply expenses are higher because you’re working. You eat out more often, buy more expensive convenience foods, may buy your lunch out and don’t have as much time to shop for bargains. Our experience was that we added $70 per week, $3,640 per year, to our expenses for food and supplies when I was working.

Then there is clothing. I worked in a doctor’s office so all I had was a uniform and shoes to buy extra. Even in my case, however, I found that I was not shopping as carefully for my other clothes because of lack of time. You may also find your working causes you to spend more on John’s clothing. You just don’ (have as much time to shop for bargains for him. And some of your work clothes undoubtedly need to be dry cleaned; you may take other garments to the cleaners because you don’t have time to do them yourself When we figured out all of the implications, we estimated our clothing expenses were $2,000 a year higher because I was working. That actually is pretty cheap. I know some women working in professional offices who spend $6,000 a year or more on clothes for work.

There are other expenses involved in working but these are often offset by savings such as lower utility bills from not being home as much. And you need to remember that you have no children so there are no expenses for day-care. Just taking the items you can easily enumerate, I suspect you’ll find the net effect of working full-time at $8 per hour is about $3,100 per year or about $155 per hour. That is facing up to the bottom line.

You can see the problem. The numbers that are true for you will obviously vary from couple to couple, but the idea is the same. A working wife does not automatically translate into significantly higher income.

A sense of independence

Now let me draw something to your attention that you really need to think about.

When we were first married, I was delighted to have a partner with whom to share life. I’d had enough of being on my own and there was no idea of establishing my independence from Uncle Tom. No doubt you feel the same way about John. Thankfully, I’m still very happy to share my life with Uncle Tom.

But as the years go by, many marriages go through their ups and downs. What started out as a happy situation sometimes turns boring, unfulfilling or hostile. Today, more often than not, that leads to separation.

One of the great curses of our society is the broken home. People have not changed over the years, so why are there more divorces today than before? I think having so many women working outside the home is a major contributing factor.

Let’s not be naive about this matter. If you are not dependent on John for financial support, you can consider living separately as a viable option — not now, but at some time when your marriage hits one of its low points which, unfortunately, could happen. Your instinctive reaction may be that it’s incredibly artificial to deliberately make yourself financially dependent so that you are forced to stay in a situation you do not like. It may seem artificial, but remember that we are trying to work with God in overcoming our own human nature, which is incredibly perverse. And! don’ t think we can deny that opportunity increases motivation. The depressed person, for example, will more likely commit suicide if the means is available.

To be honest about it, being financially dependent on Uncle Tom did help me to stick out a rough time in our marriage. We weathered that storm, with God’s help, and, in retrospect, I feel our financial situation was an element in our progress.

Of course, there is another side to this matter. Some wives have been subjected to financial blackmail by tyrannical husbands simply because they could not get a decent job if he left.

There is, in fact, a lot more that! want to share with you about working outside the home, but this is enough for one letter.